May Gumbytron heap blessings on you and yours

Residence of P.T. Barnum, by David W. Wilson (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

if it were that easy —
Oh but it is

do you need a set of instructions?

If you think TV is there to inform you
<wrong answer>
Correct Answer: TV is there to distract you
and divert you from the Truth

you trust a talking head
but argue “issues”
with those you shared a classroom with
and maybe even your Mom
but the Tube said it were so
(depending on what flavor you’re addicted to)
so it must be True

Fuck experience!
your senses may lie to you
(especially if you took as much acid as I did in ’94)
but the TV never ever never ever lies
It’s rods and cones, they comfort me
and leadeth me by still waters purified by Calgon

P.T. Barnum was an optimist
a sucker ain’t born every minute
a sucker is born with every click of the remote

Distraction
Diversion
Deception
Misdirection

if that’s yer bag, dude, who am I to call you on it?
i mean an Ostrich might find treasure sticking its head in the Sand

but you know me,
well perhaps not,
I don’t buy from Infomercials
the costs of living with myself are far too high

and I’d rather believe the Rumors I make up
than any spread on a Useless Tube